Decisions to be made

Well, the time has come to make the tough decisions about a few things. The first is the restaurant. I am STILL waiting on the bids, but have just got off the phone with one of the contractors and he should be wrapping it up with the last few bits of info I just gave him. On that note a reality check has been taking place with me, Jenn, and this whole project. What started it all is a very unhappy me, mostly because of my dead end job. Last week a few things happened at work between me and my boss and it was all i could do to not walk out with my hand in the air and a few choice words shouted over my shoulder. I did not, but the last little bit of respect I had for him and the place I work. Jenn is feeling the same way with her position. Back to the restaurant, I know that this project is going to cost upwards of $250K to get going. Like I said before, I don't have that kind of money or the collateral to go to the bank for a loan. All of the potential investors we have approached have not responded in a way that would lead one to believe that they are interested in handing over any of their hard earned money to someone they really don't know that well. I really don't have the reputation in town either to warrant anyone to come and say, "Yes we would love to fund your restaurant." So, that leaves us here, still with no money to get this going no matter what the cost is going to be. I am pretty sure that I am getting the picture that this might not be the time or place to make this happen. I know that it is a great concept and that it would go over here, but all the moral support we have received from all the people we have been talking just won't pay the bills or get us the loan. Needless to say I am still not going to quit until I at least get 1 of the quotes back. After that I think it will be time to wrap it up. I am quite bummed to say the least. Up until about a week ago I just was really sure that this thing was going to happen some how, some way. I had all these ideas about how it was going to happen and that our idea was what this town needed and someone would realize that and come our way with $$. Hey, who said I couldn't dream?

Now we have to make some even tougher decisions. Does this town hold anything else for us? What next? How much longer can I survive at my job? Do I even want to stay in the restaurant business? If we were to move, where? Jenn really, really wants to practice massage. How can we do that and where? We really need insurance. Where can we get work that will offer decent coverage? This time is so much more complicated. In the past if we had been in this spot, we would have given our 2 weeks notice, packed it up and moved to the next great location. Now we have 1 more to consider and a house to sell. We know that we just can't do it like we have in the past. We need to have at least one job before we go anywhere so that we don't get behind and have to play catch up again.

We started job searching this week to see what options we have available. We are looking all over the place, not just here. A chef friend here has been wanting to talk to me about the possibility of me working for him/ with him to really get his place going full steam. I am open to conversations. It would not solve Jenn's desire to practice massage or the insurance delima. I told him I am not a line cook and that is not what I want to do. I need more on a daily basis. I like to interact with people and deal with food. That is a big reason I wanted to open my own place, so that I could do it all. We have talked to some friends of ours that really would like us to come out to see where they live. It has a lot of restaurant and massage opportunities. It is somewhere neither of us has ever been. We are interested and are thinking about making a quick trip out that way to check things out. Right now I am just trying to move on and start thinking about the next step.
One day at a time.