Number one the decision was made to stop all restaurant plans in San Angelo. The reality hit that we just really could not afford to do something like that and that we just were not that happy in San Angelo. We had struggled for just about the entire time we were there to try and make it work. I mean, it is not that bad of a place, just not the place for us. I think that what kept me going was the prospect of having my own place and being my own boss. I had dreamt of that for so long that I began to realize that part of my job hopping was due to the fact that I never really thought of any of those jobs as permanent, or even semi-permanent. I was so convinced in my mind that one day I would work for me. Well, not right now and espcially not in San Angelo. I now can look back and see that I am glad that it did not happen for the financial burden would have been huge and I really can't imagine being tied to that town. I still have no doubt that my plan would have worked in that food starved town!
Number 2 - We moved to Greensboro, North Carolina in April. I had mentioned in my last post that we had friends in NC that wanted us to come out to visit as a option of towns to move to if the restaurant did not happen. Well once we knew that it was not going to happen, the wheels really started turning and I made a very fast trip out to NC to check out the situation. Jenn was not able to go, so I flew out for a long weekend and saw all that I needed to see. I saw a ton of opportunity for both of us. Jenn had already looked up to see if she could get her massage license in a reasonable amount of time, and she felt confident that she could. I saw several restaurants and foodservice establishments that were always looking for qualified help. That was all I needed and I came home, Jenn and I felt it was the right thing to do, and we started making plans. We put the house up and it sold in a matter of hours and we closed in, I think it was 13 days. Yes we did. Thank goodness our friends in NC told us that we could live with them until we were able to get jobs and settled in our new town. I put in my notice, we packed up our stuff in the largest UHaul they make and I headed out with Jenns Dad making the trip with me. Jenn stayed behind with Amos to finish off her job and then came out with my Mom a few weeks later. Before I left I sent 2 resumes to 2 different foodservice jobs. I probably had a little bit of reluctance to send the resumes to these jobs, because I had seriously considered getting out of the business all together. I sent the resumes and got interviews with both, one a high end local restaurant with a Asst Mgr. of the Front of the House wait staff and the other a small foodservice company out of VA taking over the dining services at Guilford College as Sous Chef/Sustainability Manager. I liked the idea of Sustainability Manager because it was something I am committed to in my personal life and I wanted to see how all of this "green" stuff could be translated in a corporate setting. I was offered both jobs within 2 days of my arrival and felt drawn to the Sous Chef/Sustainability Mgr job and started right away.
The company I was now working for had just taken over the dining services at GC and there was a lot of transition to take place, still taking place. I worked most of the summer some terribly crazy hours as the Sous Chef. I think I might have gotten a day off a week and was putting in 60 + hours per week most of the time. It sucked and I felt like I was just spinning my wheels again in this business. I wanted to move out here to be able to have friends again and working like that just made me want to not be around people after I got home from being around lots of people asking me lots of questions all day long. Not even 90 days into the job I really began to question why I was doing this, again. This same old cycle I have been in for years, going to the next best foodservice job as a chef, or cook, or front of the house manager, or waiter, or food salesman, or you name it I have done it in this business. I even went to a EAP counselor and started asking if I was crazy to be thinking of a career change.
I finally talked to my employer and we decided that I should be out of the kitchen and actually be doing the Sustainability Mgr job. I thought I would at least give it a try, although I was hesitant. My boss and I said that I would JUST be doing that job and that it would not be a good idea to fill in in the kitchen or front of the house because it would just be too easy to slip back into those roles. We even said that I could work until I got the job done and even if it was not a full 40 hours that was ok. The first week or two was good I started on the list of things to do and mostly started making contacts for all of our local/organic food stuffs. I worked Mon - Fri about 35 hours and felt good. Then all of the sudden I am on the Manager schedule 3 times a week. I was told that this was to help create a management team and so that the other managers didn't get upset that I was only working M-F. Ummm, I think the other managers were hired to actually do that, you know be Managers of the Kitchen and Front of the House on various shifts, weekends included. I did it for a few weeks but never felt like why I was doing it was so that we were creating a "Management Team." I guess that is why I was aprehensive in the first place about taking the SM job. I have been in this business too long to think I was going to get away with a M-F position, I knew it would not last. It didn't. This week I talked to my boss on M and told of my concerns and that I was going to start looking for a new job, outside of foodservice, but that I would stay on to help make the transition as long as needed.
Then on Wed I get up and am having some serious chest pains on the left side. It was some pains that I had been kinda ignoring for a few weeks. The pains would come and go, but when they came it hurt and was taking my breath away. I didn't really tell anyone and then Jenn noticed and started telling me go get it checked out. I went Wed AM and spent all morning in the Dr office getting all sorts of tests run. EKG, blood work, pee pee test, chest x rays. The Dr. was concerned that my blood pressure was off the charts, that the left side of my heart was enlarged, I had some sort of junk in my upper chest, and that my liver function was not what it was supposed to be. It scared me and the pain was really bad. The Dr. prescribed me a blood pressue med, pain med, and antibotic. As long as I was just sitting and not moving too much the pain was bearable. As soon as I got up and walked pain was really bad. I came home and Jenn who was off that day was also scared. I mean this is the kind of shit that I have seen others in this business come down with and have heart attacks. A job was not worth my health. The cycle had to stop and I was the only one that could stop it, I gave my official 2 weeks notice on Thurs. I have been home not doing much of anything since Wed waiting for the meds to take hold and finally on Saturday the pain subsided and today there was no pain and I actually went to the park with the family and we went to the pool this afternoon.
As of now I do not have a new job to start in two weeks when this one is done. I have been gathering and filling out apps for all sorts of various jobs that until now I would have never considered. I have some skills to offer someone, when all you have done is be in foodservice since you were 17 and that is all you know I realize that I will have to start over in something. Something, just not sure what, yet.
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