Overwhelmed....

It seems like I always have so much going on in my noggin these days. Most of it being what I mentioned in an earlier post, trying to open a new restaurant. Some days I feel like this is just about the craziest thing one would ever want to do and other I think that this is an excellent idea, especially for this little town. This town is full of just about every chain restaurant you can think of and it seems like they are all busy, all the time. Have the people of this town just grown to love mediocrity? Sure seems like it. When we decide that we are going to go out to eat it always turns into a "What do you want?" question and that goes back and forth for a while until one of us gets frustrated and we just go get some thing that we really don't want to eat. Sometimes as long as I can get a beer, something non domestic, I am OK with where ever because it kinda makes the food go down a little easier.

What I am wanting to do is just create a place that has a local feel with some different foods that are still recognizable by the people of the city, that is not mexican or steakhouse. Something that I have been to and worked at in every other city I have ever lived, something local! The place will have a feel like no other place in town and will have food that is different and simple. Not a lot of heavy sauces or complicated cooking processes, but fairly healthy, homemade, with use of local products (when available), and with customer service like no one else can offer. Sounds like a great place to me!

This is something I have always dreamed of doing, and I kinda always thought that this town would be a good place to try it. When I decided that I was going to do it I talked to the family and they were all in support. That was about 6 months ago and I can say that things are moving along. I have the business plan written, sample menu ready, space picked out, designs of the space drawn, calls out to get some bid for finish out of the space, and have actually started talking it up to a few folks. The one thing that will either make or break the project is $$$$$$$$$$$$$. Yes, I have a pretty good $$ in mind and it is not the kind of money i have just sitting around in some account, but it is also not that much to the right person. Our lawyer really wants us to explore the option of using investors, but finding these folks with money is something I have never done before. This project is going to get to a point where we are either going to get the money or we aren't. If the time comes where we don't get the money there is always the bank, but they want some collateral in the form of about 20-25% down. That down payment is still more money that I don't have. If we have explored all the options and we still can come up with the money, well then at least I can say I did everything possible to try and make it happen and then I can feel like I can move on from there. Where to at that point? Who knows, but it would probably be out of here.

But anyway, that is kinda where we are at with the project. It is at times very stress full to be here and be working the job I am at right now. I really feel like my mind has been stretched and I work with quite a few people whose minds have never been stretched and well it is hard to be around that. My boss especially has told me that he is just there to ride it out until retirement, he is only 42. He has already been there 10 years. Does this tell you anything? That scares me. He seems to have lost any and all creativity that he might have had some years ago and his food shows it. He is the kind of guy that will never take any responsibility for any thing he does wrong, always someone else's fault. The biggest problem is that his boss doesn't say crap to him! So this is how I see it:

If the 2 people at the top of the department don't show any excitement or leadership it is just going to trickle down to the rest of the department. If the boss doesn't care why should anyone else? I have tried to offer my professional opinion about food things and it is always like I am from some other planet. I stopped offering some time ago and that is probably wrong on my part, but it sucks to continually get looked at like a weirdo or be asked your opinion and then never have your idea taken seriously. I kinda feel like this job is one of the biggest reasons of my frustration in this town.

I have never worked in a place with such a negative feel. Part of what has always drawn me to the restaurant business is the people. Not just the variety of customers, which I love, but more the people I worked with and the amazing friendships I have created with those people. I miss that. The huge mix of people that I went to culinary school with was one of the most diverse groups of people I have ever been around. More on those days in another post later. I have met some of the most interesting people in the various restaurants I have worked in over the years and I have friends that I still keep in touch with to this day from those restaurants! I never really thought about until recently, but I put it together and realized that is what I am missing, people! In the past when I started in a new restaurant it was like I almost had an instant group of friends. Of course not all of the people I have come across have been worth a shit, but I would say most of them have been great. I really want to get my restaurant going so that I can create a great place for everyone who comes thru the door. Someday. Soon, very soon.